I can love him, and miss him.
And not want him back in my life at the same time.
I cannot turn my emotions off like a switch can be flicked.

I think about this mother-fucker every day,
Every time I touch my skin, and trace the designs.
I remember everything. And it all sickens me.
That I still think of him on a romantic note.
After how he treated me, and used me.

He was always kind of there,
I never thought he was a want that
Could become a reality.
Happy to know the truth now.
Reality was only pain. Dreams such as these
Never truly come true, anyways.

I enjoyed his company.
He made my smile spark.
He just never wanted to admit that
He felt the same as I felt about him.

I do not stay where I am not appreciated.

Experience matters more then age.


I miss his scent.
His big brown eyes.
His long brown hair.
Our late night conversations,
A joint before we went to bed.

Simple. Easy. Relaxing. Laid back. Comfortable.

Really, I don't need much more then that.


It sickens me.
That I can still miss a man, that will never admit to miss me.
He will not put his tail between his legs and admit it.
And that's ok. Because he knows that I know the truth.


I can love you, and not want you back.
I can miss you, and not want to see you.
I can talk about you, and still glow, and not speak
Bad of you. Even though I hate you so much.

The men that mean the most to me,
Have earned my respect, and I will never
Speak bad about them, because that's a hard thing to do.
And you have taught me a lesson, changed my life.

I know the pieces fit.

Because everything is finally starting to make sense.



My heart misses how you used to make me feel,
I miss you, but also, you aren't missed in the aching way.
A good memory, that makes me smile and reminisce.


I can love him, and miss him.
And not want him back in my life at the same time.
I cannot turn my emotions off like a switch can be flicked.